Las Vegas: What’s next?

If I had a crystal ball for Las Vegas’ future, I’d be a wealthier man. Not having one, I consulting some fellows far more perspicacious than myself. In no particular order they include Dennis Conrad, scholars Bill Eadington, Eugene Moehring and David G. Schwartz, Hunter Hillegas, bond analyst David Hargreaves, publisher Charles Anderer, and former Clark County CFO Guy Hobbs. (Taking a break from his McKnight Fellowship, Steve Friess lent me some helpful background on Macao that, regrettably, didn’t make it into the story.) With so many visiting experts, there much good material that hit the cutting room floor, so S&G readers can look forward to “outtakes” this week’s CityLife cover story. My apologies to Arthur Miller, from one of whose plays the title was shamelessly snurched. (There’s also a Luis Buñuel reference, for those who enjoy such arcana.)

Golden handshake: The producers of Broadway‘s troubled Spider-Man: Turn off the Dark have reached a settlement with cashiered director Julie Taymor (The Lion King). Ms. Taymor walks off with a bundle of royalties and 8 Legged Productions has one less encumbrance dangling over the show’s head. Since Spider-Man is one of the highest-grossing plays on B’way (making in excess of $1.2 million per week), it’s slightly mystifying that it would be fast-tracked to Vegas as a possible replacement for Jersey Boys or Phantom of the Opera at Venelazzo.

Why the rush? Do the producers fear that the show doesn’t have — pardon the pun — “legs”? Why leapfrog past the national tour to set up a “tab” version on the Strip? Spider-Man is seven months into its New York run. Jersey Boys had been playing 2.5 years by the time it opened in Vegas and Phantom took 18 leisurely years to reach the Strip. My spidey sense tells me that 8 Legged Prods. is hoping to cash out quickly. Either that or Las Vegas Sands is trying to block the soon-to-open Smith Center from booking a multi-month Spider-Man touring company, as it already did with Wicked. Probably a lot of both. And it’s no wonder that Spider-Man has been an ill-starred show: It’s playing in New York’s Foxwoods Theater. What worse augury could you have than to open in a house named after an insolvent casino?

Presidential humor. Give the mixologists at The Mirage props for coming up with humorous drink specials in observance of Presidents’ Day. From Friday through Monday, at $12 a glass, you can have your choice of the …

My favorite Grant Wood painting, “Parson Weems’ Fable.”

Obamarita: “Cast your vote for this patriotic margarita in celebration of our current Commander-In-Chief. Follow our leader with a liberal pour of el Jimador Blanco tequila and Solerno Blood Orange Liqueur shaken with fresh lime juice, agave nectar and Monin Blood Orange Syrup for the ultimate Obamarita.”

Lincoln Lemonade: “Four score and seven cheers ago, Honest Abe was known for speaking truth, so it’s only natural that his potent Lincoln Lemonade, spiked with Grey Goose vodka and triple sec, may leave drinkers feeling loose-lipped.”

The Kennedy: “Known for his charm and grace, JFK and his legacy still reign today. Be whisked away to the family home in Martha’s Vineyard with just one sip of JFK’s favorite drink, a rum daiquiri. This refreshing cocktail is mixed with Cruzan Strawberry Rum, lime juice, muddled strawberries and mint leaves.”

Washington Apple Martini: “Nothing beats an original. Toast the first president of the United States with a Washington Apple Martini, flavored with Crown Royal® Canadian Whisky, DeKuyper®, Sour Apple Pucker schnapps and cranberry juice.”

I cannot tell a lie: This is a target-rich environment for jokes … but I’ll leave that to you.

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